Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

If a narcissist can't feel remorse, can they ever feel regret for an evil act after going to rehab?

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

What does it mean to live "the 'underconsumption' life"?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

Why do nice guys rarely or never win?

I have complete contempt for fakery

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Why do we let ugly men exist?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

Why do I keep waking up at 4 AM?

I can count

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

What's wrong with white women?

I can read

I don’t cotton to rapists

I understand how hurricane paths work

If you lived in South Africa, would you support nuclear power as a solution to the country's energy woes?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I see through liars

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

What is the moral stance on lying? Can you provide examples of when it is appropriate or inappropriate to lie? Does the Bible address this issue?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t buy bullshit

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I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I actually pay taxes

How do I beat domestic battery charges against my covert narcissist husband who is lying and playing the victim?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Why is going on a date today so much different than it was when I was young?

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Why has Biden pulled ahead in battleground states and is now projected to win the 2024 presidency?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Why do many people think that Japan is not a gay-friendly country whereas 72% Japanese support same-sex marriage (the same number as in the US)?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Jenny from Perth writes – my partner is the life of the party, women and men adore him. But at home, he gets angry at us for the silliest reasons and never nice words me or our kids, always putting us down. Should I stay or leave him?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

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Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight